Lucas

What a week this has been. First, thanks to many of you for the kind notes regarding Namushi's death - can't tell you how much those have meant...Thanks too for the many prayers that no doubt have sustained us and encouraged us to take the steps that we have.

After talking with Namushis' family members on Friday regarding the plans for the kids, it became clear that there were not many options for the youngest, Lucas. Both Molly and I (and the kids for that matter) felt like we should step forward and agreed to take in Lucas for this interim period while long term plans take shape.

On Saturday morning we were in Namushis' traditional village picking up Lucas which was surreal at so many levels. It felt like being taken out of the audience of the tragic play we were watching and being thrust onto the stage (more on this later...)

The good news is that Lucas seems to be doing quite well. He is very aware of what happened, but he is engaging in life, laughing, playing and doing what 5 year old boys do. (Thanks to Brad, Lucas also goes by "L-train" to go with "Mac-attack, C-money and B-town") Our kids have, for the most part, embraced the opportunity to care for Lucas. It has been hardest for Bennett who has had to share his "Lone Little Brother" role, but they have also had a lot of fun together. Our belief is that this is a temporary arrangement, but in the back of everyone's mind is the possibility that Lucas could become part of our family. We have always held out this possibility (adoption) but have never actively pursued anything. At this point, it is a day at a time and we are mentally looking at this as foster care for a little boy in trauma. Anything more than that overwhelms one or both of us depending on the hour. We'll see what unfolds.

During this window of Namushis death and Lucas moving in we have been dealing with a more mundane but serious issue. When we returned home last Tuesday we learned that our land-lord had used a toxic paint (and paint-thinner) to cover the inside of our water storage system. The water running through our taps smelled (and tasted) like, well, paint and paint thinner. The tank was drained and the tank was properly painted and treated and the pipes were flushed out. We spent Thursday through Sunday in hotels and came home Monday morning thinking things were resolved... Unfortuneately, the water still smells (and presumably taste) like paint and paint thinner. Our land-lord has washed his hands of the problem and I am working with our operations manager trying to get to a solution. If we can't figure out how to get the toxic materials out of the water system we would obviously have to move which is not what we are looking to do right now.

Given all this in the last week, it is safe to say that we hit a low-point yesterday. Today was a new day and we are moving foward. I think one of the blessings of trying windows in life is that things boil down to their essence. We live with a more singular focus and an understanding of what is important and what is not. We take Jesus' words "Don't worry about tomorrow....each day has enough trouble of its own..." to heart.

I mentioned above the feeling of being on the stage when we only meant to be in the audience. This is a confession of sorts. I've realized as the challenges of this world have come crashing into our home that I never intended to get this involved or certainly did not mean to get my family this involved. Using the play analogy, I wanted my kids to have a good seat, to see the world, meet some actors, maybe serve them some popcorn at intermission - I did not want them (or me) thrust into the scene where all hell breaks loose - who would? But here we find ourselves trying to trust what we saw clearly in the light, but that fades in the dark. We are also remembering that we are not here on our own and that we are here on behalf of many of you. We are caring for Lucas and the others in your stead. We feel this and believe it.

I also think in these challenging windows we are more open to hearing God's still voice when he speaks to us. There have been doubts these last 4 days about taking Lucas in...A sense of what are we doing and just wanting things back to normal (whatever that means...) So, in the midst of this we get an e-mail from a list we subscribe to with the following quote from Henri Nouwen,

"We become neighbours when we are willing to cross the road for one another. There is so much separation and segregation: between black people and white people, between young people and old people, between sick people and healthy people, between prisoners and free people, between Jews and Gentiles, Muslims and Christians, Protestants and Catholics, Greek Catholics and Latin Catholics.

There is a lot of road crossing to do. We are all very busy in our own circles. We have our own people to go to and our own affairs to take care of. But if we could cross the street once in a while and pay attention to what is happening on the other side, we might become neighbours."

Namushi and Lucas used to live across the street from us. In another window I would have read this (or not) and missed the point. O.k. God, we hear ya.

Overlaying this last week has been a great visit with Molly's brother and his wife, Brad and Carrie. It was wonderful to have them here and to give them the steroid version of our life here. The first week we got them acclimated and then travelled to Victoria Falls and Botswanna. We had several good adventures including not having lodging after-all in Botswana and camping in the back yard of the guy who picked us up at the border. Hats of to Steve in Chobe. We also crossed the border from Zambia to Botswana at the only place in the world where 4 countries come together - Zambia, Botswana, Zimbabwe and Namibia. Nobody but me seemed to care about this despite my bringing it up several times (so I am told.) Having them here as we have dealt with this last week has been a gift. We posted several pics from their trip here.

Thanks for reading and thanks for walking with us from a distance. We are grateful.

Jeff and Molly

p.s. Several of you have asked if you can financially help Namushi's children. The answer is yes. Quentin's education is covered right now, but if anyone is willing to help cover the costs of the other three kids that would be great. We are sending gifts through the TFC account. Checks can be made out to Brad Lounsberry and sent to:

1824 Clinton Ave. S #4
Minneapolis, MN 55404

Just put "Namushis' Kids" in the memo line. Thanks.

The Loss of a Friend

Sometimes the brokeness of this world seems like too much. We came home Tuesday night from a short holiday with Brad and Carrie to perhaps one of the worst tragedies I've ever been close too.

Let me back up. When we moved here a year ago (exactly a year ago yesterday) one of the first people we met was a wonderful man named Namushi. He was the gardner at the house next door. I remember well the first time I met him, his wide smile and warm and welcoming demeanor.

As we got to know Namushi my respect for him continued to grow. His four children adored him and it was clear that he was committed to giving them everything he could despite his own humble circumstances. He was constantly working extra jobs (with great expertise) to be able to send his kids to the best schools and was always working with his kids on homework and making sure they were speaking English at home. I've rarely seen a more loving or committed Father in action anywhere.

His kids became good friends to ours, particularly his youngest son Lucas, who is Bennett's age and has become Bennett's best friend here.

When I became discouraged at the many problems this country is facing, I would often think of Namushi and smile and know that one life and one family at a time, things were changing for the better and that in a generation this country would be in a different place.

On Tuesday night we came home to the news that, beyond all reason, Namushi had killed himself on Sunday in front of his wife and three of his children. I can hardly write this down because it is so incongruent with the man I knew. We knew that there were some problems in his marriage largely due to several very poor choices his wife had made - but to take the action he did makes no sense. We are all very, very sad both for the loss of a good man and even more so for the trauma he has caused in the life of his children, Quintin, Exit, Trenche and Lucas.

At the burial in the village on Tuesday, his wife and the kids' mother was named publically as the cause of death, further traumatizing the kids. We don't yet know what is going to happen to the children, but we think it is unlikely that Namushis' relatives will allow the children to be with their mother. We are hoping to see the kids later today and learn more.

This extreme act has jerked the rug out from underneath us and cast a light on the daily brokeness that we are surrounded by. It is easy for us, with our expat life, to show you the nicer side of living in Africa when the reality is we are living in war zone created largely by poverty, disease and death. As Christians we know that we live in a fallen world desperately in need of redemption. As affluent, western Christians it is easy to forget this truth. Living here we are reminded daily of the broken world in which we live and understand in new ways Jesus prayer, "Your Kingdom come, Your will be done, on earth as it is in Heaven..." Those of us in America are not immune from suffering or brokeness - in fact it just takes different forms, e.g. materialism/affluenza, isolation, greed etc. But here, when I am honest, the brokeness is so in your face and offensive it can literally make you nauseous.

Please join us in praying for Namushis' children and family and for somehow this situation to be redeemed.

Selfishly, pray for us as we enter our second year in Zambia that we will continue to see, and be, light in the darkness.

Jeff

Bells, Bushes and Beating the Brits

It is the 4th of July, only not quite. First, I am at the office working. Second, it is cold - Not Minnesota in January cold, but sweater-wool socks-and-my-hands-are-freezing-as-I-type-cold. It is the southern hemisphere winter and because Lusaka is close to 5,000 ft above sea level it gets cold despite our proximity to the equator. The conditions mentioned above, e.g. working, wool socks and being cold are not making for a very festive holiday - certainly a far cry from being at the lake.

It is now the 5th of July -- more commonly referred to as July 5th. It is slightly warmer and yesterday (the 4th) was salvaged when some American neighbors invited us over for some fireworks in their backyard...Despite it feeling like we should have been trick or treating, it was fun to blow some things up in honor of our country's independence. (Incidentally, we share being a former colony of Great Britain with Zambia which several Zambian colleagues brought up yesterday...We had fun giving the one Brit in our office a hard time.)

The last couple weeks have been full, busy and fun. We had 5 out 6 members of the Bell family (One year old Mary stayed home) here with us for 10 days which was a huge gift to our family. We had a great time traveling and just hanging out together...When you are living so far from friends and family the appreciation factor for times like this is high -Fellowship is a true gift from God. Being with friends was an encouragement to all of us and reminded us, despite missing home, of why we are here. Guests provide an opportunity to see things through new eyes. In many ways living here is like a fast...A fast from things you take for granted and, like a fast from food, not always pleasant. Yet, just like with a food fast, there is the sense through the hunger that this is good for you, body, mind and soul. Having friends and family come is like the feast. (New photos posted)

During the same time the Bells were here, World Vision/RAPIDS hosted Laura and Jenna Bush (and at least 50 secret service, staff etc. etc.) They were both very engaged, warm and personable. What most Americans don't know about is the tremendous amount of good our country is doing in places like Zambia. The funding from the U.S. is coming to programs like ours to care for orphans and widows, feed the hungry, provide investment capital to start businesses, buy drugs that keep an HIV+ mother alive and therby prevent 4 more kids from growing up parentless etc. etc. The U.S. Government money, e.g. your tax dollars is then combined with private funding to create an even more leveraged and significant impact. The Bushes visit celebrated the many partnerships that are working to save and improve lives here on the ground.

Following are several links related to the visit and the World Vision/RAPIDS program.

Laura Bush touts aid successes on Africa tour
The first lady, on a four-nation trip, highlights public-private partnerships in Zambia Thursday -- Christian Science Monitor

Pictures of the First Lady's Visit

First Lady's speech at our site

Our family is well and settling into a new "summer" routine. The kids are participating in different sports and activities, horse riding, tennis etc. and enjoying lots of down-time. They are excited (as are we) to have Molly's brother Brad and his wife Carrie arrive next week.

Send us an e-mail...We would love an update on you. (molly@dykstrafamily.net or jdykstra@worldvision.org)

Cheers,

The Dykstra Family

p.s. The July issue of Vanity Fair is focused exclusively on Africa...There are several good articles, my favorite, by a young Kenyan writer, poignantly captures the reality of the problems and potential for many African countries...Read the story here.